Happy 6th Birthday, Declan. I love you!

Celebrating my son Declan’s 6th birthday at the Minnesota State Capitol — without him.

When courts ignore the law, family separation becomes state-sanctioned kidnapping.

Today February 4, 2026 my son turns six.

This is his second birthday that I’ve missed.

At first, you don’t believe it will last.

You think it will be days. Then weeks.

Then months pass.

And before you realize it, years are gone.

The hardest truth to say out loud is this: I don’t really know my son anymore. Not because I stopped loving him. Not because I stopped trying. But because time was taken from us — slowly, deliberately, and with full knowledge by the system that was supposed to protect us.

Declan started kindergarten this year. I’ve heard he’s made friends. I imagine him taller now, more grown and different. I wonder what he laughs at. I wonder what scares him. I wonder if he still remembers how we used to play. I wonder if he remembers he used to call me dad.

And I wonder how much of me he remembers at all.

The last times I was allowed to see him, he had been heavily alienated from me. He didn’t have good feelings toward his dad — feelings that were proven false in court over a year ago, but facts don’t matter much to a young child who’s been conditioned otherwise.

What matters is time.

And during our visits, something incredible happened.

Slowly, visit by visit, he started to come back. His sister too. By the last visits, they didn’t want to leave. They wanted to keep playing. They were reconnecting — naturally, safely, and lovingly.

Then it all stopped.

Not because of danger.

Not because of evidence.

Not because of the law.

It stopped because their mother — with the help of her attorneys — chose to ignore state statute, a signed mediation agreement, and multiple court orders. And believe it or not, the court allowed it.

Judges issued many orders and then refused to enforce them. A contempt motion was denied. Everything was “left for trial,” a trial scheduled 18 months after separation. Then opposing counsel used delay tactics to push it another five months.

By the time the law is even allowed a chance to work, my children will have been separated from me for years.

Years.

Even though the last time I saw my son, he was coming back to me.

Now I fear what that time has done.

How much trauma has been inflicted.

How much damage will need to be undone.

And for what?

This part of the post is for you, Declan.

Happy birthday, buddy. I love you more than you can understand right now. I think about you every single day. I cannot wait to be reunited with you. I hope you have the best day today.

Love,

Dad 🎂

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Now, to Everyone Else Reading This

I’m writing this from the Minnesota State Capitol in the Minneapolis–St. Paul metro.

And I need to say something uncomfortable.

I feel ashamed of what's happening in this state. On all sides.

Not because people are angry. Not because people are protesting. But because of what we choose to be outraged by — and what we ignore.

Right now, Minnesota is consumed with national political battles. ICE. DHS. State power. Financial fraud. Two recent deaths in Minneapolis. All of it matters. Every life matters.

But here’s the truth we refuse to face:

The same due process violations people are outraged about today have been happening in family court for decades — quietly, systematically, and with far more destruction.

Children are being ripped from loving parents.

Court orders are ignored without consequence.

Due process is treated as optional.

Judicial immunity is absolute.

And there is no accountability.

Mothers and fathers are dying because of this system. Suicide rates among parents trapped in family court are among the highest anywhere.

Children are dying too — after the systems meant to protect them repeatedly ignore warnings and fail to act.

See yesterday’s post here: https://www.facebook.com/share/p/1G7CBD9huu/

See this article about Eli Hart: https://www.fox9.com/news/charges-mom-fatally-shot-6-year-old-son-hid-his-body-in-trunk-of-car

Or this recent one: https://bringmethenews.com/minnesota-news/charge-champlin-woman-killed-her-18-month-old-daughter-after-losing-custody

Keep looking - they're not hard to find. It's called Google search.

Where is the outrage for them?

Where are the protests when children are removed without evidence?

Where are the chants when court orders go unenforced?

Where are the whistles when parents are erased from their children’s lives?

How many graves of children, mothers, and fathers have you stood beside because of this system?

And here’s the part no one wants to hear:

You are responsible too.

You elected the officials who oversee this system. They work for you. But they only act when you demand it.

Have you demanded reform?

Have you contacted your legislators?

Have you been loud?

Have you organized your neighbors?

Have you gotten angry enough to act?

Or have you accepted this as “just how it is”?

We only seem to care about fraud when it involves money — not when it involves families, children, or human lives.

That says something about us as a society.

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If You Care, Here’s What to Do

For Declan’s birthday, I’m asking you to do something real.

Go here:👉 https://www.ryanalvar.com/legislation

Contact your legislators. Demand family court reform.

Then don’t stop there.

Get angry. Get fired up. Share this. Talk to people. Ask ten others to do the same — and ask them to keep it going. Not for me. Not for politics.

For children.

People trust their friends and family. Action spreads that way. This is how change actually happens.

I’m not at the Minnesota State Capitol every day because it’s fun. I’m here because someone has to be — and because I refuse to let my children’s pain be ignored.

But I cannot do this alone.

I need you.

Our children need you.

Mothers and fathers need you.

Future generations need you.

“There’s a saying that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

We’re better than this.

Let’s prove it. Let’s lead the nation. And when this system finally changes — when families are protected instead of destroyed — I expect every one of you to be there to celebrate.

In honor of Declan on his 6th birthday 🎂

Here’s the only cake and candles I can share with you today.

We can do this — together.

Ryan Alvar

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🔁 Join the Fight for Reform

I have filed a federal civil rights lawsuit challenging systemic misconduct by judges, attorneys, and state agencies that has stripped parents of their rights and traumatized countless children.

With 27 defendants, including the State of Minnesota, this case seeks accountability — and reform.

Join me in taking this mission national.

How You Can Help:

✅ Sign the Petition: Urge DOJ to investigate family-court violations

✅ Subscribe: Stay updated — Contact

✅ Visit: www.ryanalvar.com

✅ Support the Fight: GoFundMe – Help Cover Legal Costs & Reform Efforts

✅ Follow & Share: Real Dad Initiative

✅ Contact Your Legislators: Demand oversight for Judges, GALs and transparency in family court.

Family-court reform won’t happen unless lawmakers hear directly from the people.

If what you’ve read here troubles you, don’t stop at signing the petition—call and email your state legislators. Tell them that what has happened in this case—and in so many others—proves we need oversight for judges and guardians ad litem, uniform due-process protections, and full transparency in family courts.

📬 Not sure who represents you?

💬 Not sure what to say?

I made it easy.

👉 Start here: 🔗 Legislation

Across the country, I’ve heard from parents who’ve lost everything—many haven’t seen their children in years. When the system designed to protect families becomes the weapon that destroys them, it’s time for change. We must fix this broken family court system. Until that day, I’ll keep fighting—for our children, for truth, and for justice.

"582 days since my children were kidnapped. This isn't over."

Ryan William Alvar

Parent and Plaintiff

#theduluthmodel #FamilyCourtReform #falseallegations #mentalhealthmatters #RealDadInitiative #StopParentalAlienation #VoicesOfAlienatedKids