Why I Filed for Temporary Custody of My Children
- Ryan Alvar
- Jun 2
- 6 min read
Updated: Jul 12
Last week, on Thursday, May 29, 2024, I filed a formal Motion for Temporary Sole Custody—or, in the alternative, Temporary 50/50 Custody—with the St. Louis County District Court. The hearing is scheduled for Thursday, July 10, 2025, at 11:45 a.m. before Judge Nicole L. Hopps in Duluth, Minnesota.
This motion isn’t just legal paperwork—it’s a plea to protect my children from continued trauma, emotional harm, and a broken system that has failed to uphold their best interests. Just as important, I have every legal right to request—and be awarded—this temporary custody based on Minnesota law, the U.S. Constitution, and established legal precedent. What follows is a summary of what was filed and why.
🔍 Background
On July 2, 2024, the children's mother physically assaulted me and fled with the children. Ten days later, she obtained an emergency Order for Protection (OFP) based on false claims—allegations regarding the children that have since been discredited by court findings and verifiable facts.
By October 23, 2024, the Court removed the children from the OFP, ruling that:
There was no imminent harm,
The allegations were not credible, and
Both parents care for and love their children.
Still, despite being legally cleared, I’ve been denied access to my children, while their emotional health continues to decline.
⚖️ Why I’m Asking the Court to Step In
Legally, I should not be subject to supervised visitation. There is no finding of abuse, neglect, or danger that would justify such a restriction under Minnesota law. The only reason I agreed to supervised visitation was because, each time I requested temporary custody before our mediation, the court denied my request. Supervised visits were the only form of parenting time Amy was willing to allow. I didn’t choose this path—I was forced into it just to see my children. And I was forced into it because the courts repeatedly failed to take action when they had the chance.
Since the OFP regarding the children was lifted on October 23rd, 2024:
A court-appointed Guardian ad Litem (GAL) initially supported increased visitation, citing no safety concerns.
That recommendation was reversed—without new evidence—after I publicly criticized her report’s flaws.
The mother has manipulated visitation policies, including getting the DAIP Visitation Center to revoke our agreement allowing recorded visits—recordings that showed the children in visible distress.
Another center has offered times for visits. She has ignored them.
A recent order requiring supervised visitation to resume has been completely ignored.
💔 The Harm to My Children
My children are suffering. The trauma is real and well-documented:
Staff from the visitation center observed persistent and concerning behavior: crying, hiding, saying “dad is bad” and “mom says we don’t have to talk to you, we don’t have to sit with you, we don’t have to play with you, we can tell you to shut up.” These were 4- and 3-year-old children during these visits.
On December 23, 2024, the visitation center submitted a letter to the Court stating:
"To Whom It May Concern, This letter is regarding supervised parenting time records for Ryan Alvar (court file no. 69DU-FA-24-551). In accordance with the mediated court order, Mr. Alvar has participated in supervised parenting time through our agency. At this time, Mr. Alvar is regularly scheduled once per week for 1.5 hours per parenting time and has attended 4 weeks in a row. Our staff have not documented any safety concerns or policy violations of Mr. Alvar while he is executing his parenting time."
Audio recordings confirm their fear, confusion, and distress during visits—behaviors they never showed when they were in my care. Before they were removed, we would sit together as a family, with both children often sitting on my lap to play. Amy would sometimes get upset that they preferred sitting with me, and I would reassure her by telling her the kids had asked about her during the day, just to help her feel better. I went from that—to this.
Even the GAL initially recognized the importance of my role as a father—until pressure reversed her stance.
📚 Why This Matters Now
Both Amy and I are currently undergoing mental health evaluations, as agreed upon during mediation. In Minnesota family court, when one party is asked or required to undergo a mental health assessment, both parties must be evaluated to ensure fairness and balance in determining the best interests of the children. Her past includes profound trauma, including severe abuse by her own parents. Her history is documented in police reports, parental criminal convictions, and her own testimony. None of this disqualifies her as a parent—but it does raise serious concerns about how that unresolved trauma may be affecting her ability to co-parent safely and responsibly.
Her unresolved trauma is manifesting in harmful behaviors that are affecting our kids. If we don’t intervene, they will carry this trauma for the rest of their lives. Research from the CDC and experts on Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) confirms what many of us already know: Early trauma shapes everything—from brain development to emotional regulation to lifelong health.
💬 A Moment That Speaks Volumes
One day last summer, Amy held our son Declan—then four years old—in front of me outside a restaurant, while she called the police to claim I had violated the OFP. I stood there with my adult daughter and my parents, unable to speak, approach, or comfort my own child.
To Declan, I was just standing there doing nothing. He didn’t understand the law. He didn’t know I was prohibited from coming to him. All he saw was rejection. And I couldn’t do a thing about it.
Moments like that scar children. She did this.
🚨 What I’m Asking the Court
I’ve asked the Court to:
Grant me temporary sole custody, or
At the very least, grant temporary 50/50 custody, so I can be in my children’s lives again in a meaningful way.
I’ve also asked the Court to consider:
The evidence of emotional harm,
The interference with visitation,
The manipulation of legal processes, and
The long-term consequences of inaction.
💪 I Won’t Stop
I am a fit, loving, and responsible father. There is no legal reason I shouldn’t be in my children’s lives right now. And I will not stop fighting—not just for them, but for Amy too. I want her to be well. I want our children to be safe. And I want this to be handled the way our laws say it should be: with truth, fairness, and care.
If I have this mound of evidence, clear proof of trauma, and documented patterns of her behavior—and I still have to fight my own government this hard just to protect my children—what happens to the parents who have nothing but their word? They give up. Not because they want to, but because they don't have a choice.
If this system can’t follow the law for us, then how many others has it failed?
📅 Hearing Date
Thursday, July 10, 2025
11:45 a.m.
St. Louis County Courthouse – Duluth, MN
📄 View the Full Motion and Affidavit
Motion for Temporary Custody and supporting Affidavit, below:
These filings contain the full legal argument, factual background, and documentation presented to the Court. However, please note that this is not the full extent of the evidence. Some has already been submitted, and there is more to come as this case moves forward. I believe in full transparency—and I want people to see exactly why this fight matters.
335 days since my children were kidnapped. This isn't over.
🔁 Join the Fight for Reform
✅ Visit: www.ryanalvar.com
✅ Support: GoFundMe – Help Cover Legal Costs & Reform Efforts
✅ Follow & Share: Real Dad Initiative
✅ Write Your Legislators: Demand oversight for GALs and transparency in family court
Believe it or not, your influence on your state representative and state senator can open the door to change. A quick email or call from you can make a big impact.
If you're not sure who represents you, this website makes it easy to find out: 🔗 https://www.gis.lcc.mn.gov/iMaps/districts/
I’ve already heard from parents who’ve lost everything. Some haven’t seen their children in years.
This is real. This is dangerous. And this is why we fight.
Ryan -
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